Waiting......

Last October, Ethan had a skin biopsy. We were told it would take 4-5 months to get the results. At first, that felt like an eternity. I was so anxious at the thought of waiting that long, for what should be a firm diagnosis for Ethan. As the weeks passed, the anxiety faded as I know it really won't change anything. With either diagnosis, he'll still be at a higher risk for hospitalization when he's sick, he'll still need long term therapy to address his developmental delays, and most importantly, he'll still be one of the happiest, cutest babies around. However, it's now been just about 5 months, and all of the anxiety and "what ifs" are coming back. What if the test comes back without a diagnosis, what if the result is something other than what the doctor thought it would be, what if..... I could go on for quite some time. But, that's not healthy. So, for now I'm trying not to worry about it. At times it feels easy, and at times, it feels impossible. Either way, I don't really have a choice.